Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
