Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
It was confusing and full of hummus
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
