i jhust puked up my retainher.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
