Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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