i just had sex bonerless
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
