Midget sex pt 2 tonight
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Randomize
