I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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