so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
