she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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