im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize