Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
