I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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