YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
