he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
