Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize