Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
