I can tuck mytits in my pants
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize
