I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
After tacos, we're chasing women.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
