When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
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