Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
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