**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
