So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
