we're blogging at a bar
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
