is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
