I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
