Jerry, you need to find god
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize
