woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
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