So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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