It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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