just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
