When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
