You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize