Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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