I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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