Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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