wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
