i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
