It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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