just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
