If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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