How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
