This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
