She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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