margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
