ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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