what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
