she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
