I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
