Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
