we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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