im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
don't judge my taste in strippers
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
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